Journey to Israel - Chapter 8

Chapter 8 - Wednesday, 3/22/89

Today we headed south to the area of the patriarchs. We stopped at Elah Brook and selected smooth round stones, just as David did from the same brook as he prepared to meet Goliath. We stopped at the ruins of Beersheva where Abraham made an oath at the well. I thought about Abraham and how God called him to leave his country behind and head to a place known only to God. Abraham moved forward in faith, fully trusting God, and wanting God’s best in his life.

I can identify with that same call in my life. I have had to leave behind the security of my heritage and proceed forward in faith to wherever God is leading me. In a sense I have left my “family” (denomination) behind, believing God wants my total dependence to be placed in Him alone. (1999 note - this was during the period in which God took us on a five year journey away from the Church of the Nazarene. It was one of the most profitable journeys I have ever been on!)

Abraham was faced with two options as he followed God. He could isolate, be set apart as God called him to be, or he could assimilate, mix in with depraved humanity and ways not of God. He assimilated in Egypt, willing to give his wife to Pharaoh instead of trusting God for protection. He assimilated with Hagar, instead of waiting for God to give him descendants through his wife Sarah.

Isolate or assimilate...we face those same decisions in our choices today. Do we trust God enough to wait on His timing? Do we have faith enough to believe that He is in control and will see us through every circumstance of our life? I know I must learn to be patient and not try to bring about results in my own way. I must wait upon the Lord.

We went into the wilderness of Zin where the Hebrew children wandered for forty years. We were there only two hours, hiking through the dry canyon, and it was easy to understand why they wanted to go back to Egypt. Had they not disobeyed God, they could have gone on into the promised land. In that same way disobedience in our lives lead us into dry periods in the Christian walk. I want to walk through every door God opens for me, and walk away from those He closes. I trust His wisdom much more than my own.

Down in the Negev area we saw the ancient ruins of Arad, dating to 2600 BC. The only temple left in Israel is still partially visible here. It was interesting to see how the rooms were separated, knowing the Holy of Holies was such a sacred part of the temple. How precious of our Lord to make it possible for each one of us today to enter that “holy of holies”, into the presence of our Father in the sanctuary of our hearts. He is always there waiting for us to give Him praise and pour our hearts out to Him. How I love Him!

Stepping Out in Faith

So, here it is...Sunday again.  My, the weeks seem to go by so quickly.  This has been a full week also.  We were at M-11, a Nazarene evangelism conference (which occurs every four years...not every year, like I previously mentioned in an earlier blog) from Sunday night until Wednesday afternoon.  We traveled home on Wednesday, picked up the dogs on Thursday from the kennel, and we were back to our normal routine.  Hubby had an archery training event he attended most of the day on Friday, and he attended Nazarene Team Day on Saturday...a tri-district event that occurs every spring.  ILNC had  a booth there also.  I chose to not go so I could play catch up at home.  


We truly enjoyed all of the sessions at M-11.  It was a revival to our souls, and gave us hope for the direction the church is taking.  We ended up not attending our local church this morning, but we have a "favorite" Sunday morning church to attend.  It's Thomas Road Baptist Church, with Pastor Jonathon Falwell (Jerry's son).  He preaches very challenging messages...the kind that pushes you to make changes in your lives.  He's not afraid of offending people, but is very obedient to preaching God's truth.  I wish I had a local church that had that kind of preaching!


Sometimes I wonder what Jesus would do on Sunday mornings...except I know HE would be preaching himself in some scenario...not necessarily the church building.  My dilemma...do I go to church because that is what Christians are supposed to do...be part of the body of Christ...and yet not enjoy the music style nor be challenged by the "three piece suit" sermon.  Or do I listen to a message that I know will encourage me to better serve Christ, and make choices Christ will make.  After this morning, I made the suggestion to hubby that we attend the local church, which has the morning worship service first (9:30 a.m.) followed by Sunday School (11 a.m.), and then come home for our SS class...taught by Jonathon Falwell.  Well, this is a small dilemma, not that big of a deal, but I am very sensitive about doing what pleases Jesus.


I am following the budget system that I am learning in Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University classes.  It looks real good on paper...I'll just have to see how it pans out.  I've got us on envelopes for food, gas, household items, and personal care items.  Only so much per week to spend, so I have to watch carefully that I don't overspend in those areas.  With gas prices continuing to escalate, this could be tight.  The rest of the cash flow is budgeted out and paid by check or electronic fund transfer.  I put it all down in our register the first of the month so I know what our balance is throughout the month.  The idea is to have a zero balance budget.  Every dollar is accounted for so that what you bring in for a month is what you spend out (which includes saving).  Like I said...looks good on paper.  I hope it works for us.  In the first six weeks of classes I have been able to pay $1500 on our debts and save our minimal emergency fund.  For that I feel grateful.  I believe God is helping me on this journey toward financial peace.


By the way, I think I would like to go back to Louisville to tour around some day.  It seemed to be a very friendly, clean city, with lots of things to see and do.  This trip we were on a tight schedule, with no time for site-seeing.  Maybe some day we will make it back.


I'm extremely tired today.  I cleaned house and did all the laundry and shopping yesterday while hubby was gone.  Today I feel like relaxing, reading, napping.  Therefore, let me summarize my week's worth of devotions:


"The Word for You Today"
1.  "What you learn in crisis":

• crisis can be the friend that moves you to action
• when you take one step in faith, God moves on your behalf
• God's blessings must be shared with others

2.  "Live between the steps":

• make the most of every moment, for you never know when your last moment will be

3.  "Praise in the early stages":

• praise is an act of faith:  God's plan always prevails, and what God starts, He completes
• praise strengthens you:  The joy of the Lord is your strength (Neh 8:10); His joy in you will make your task easier
• praise changes your environment:  your outlook changes as you lift your heart in praise; when you praise God in the early stages, you will better complete your task

4.  "Walking on water":

• if you are not called by God to do something, don't do it
• learn to discern between God's voice and your own (ouch!  Need help here!)
• you must leave your comfort zone to experience miracles
• step out in faith to accomplish God's desires for you
• focus on Jesus, not the storm around you
• setbacks are part of the journey...expect them, but keep going forward in faith
• act regardless of your fear, for that is how you grow and overcome your fear
• staying in the safety zone diminishes God's voice until you no longer hear him
• failing does not make you a failure, but quitting does
• failing is just another opportunity to get it right
• failing comes from letting your fears stop you
• when you fail, Jesus is right there within your reach - call on him
• stepping out in faith strengthens you to do greater things

Leviticus - Old Testament

• The Lord also told Moses to tell the people of Israel, "You must be holy because I, the Lord your God, am holy."  (19:1)
• (20:26)

Mark - New Testament

• Your souls aren't harmed by what you eat, but by what you think and say!  (7:15-16)
• It is the thought life that pollutes.  For from within, out of men's hearts, come evil thoughts of lust, theft, murder, adultery, wanting what belongs to others, wickedness, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, pride, and all other folly.  All these wile things come from within; they are what pollute you and make you unfit for God.  (7:20-23)
• "If any of you wants to be my follower," he told them, "you must put aside your own pleasures and shoulder your cross, and follow me closely.  If you insist on saving your life, you will lose it.  Only those who throw away their lives for my sake and for the sake of the Good News will ever know what it means to really live.  (8:34-35)

Psalms

• Don't be impatient for the Lord to act!  Keep traveling steadily along his pathway and in due season he will honor you with every blessing and you will see the wicked destroyed. (37:34)
• The Lord saves the godly!  He is their salvation and their refuge when trouble comes.  Because they trust in him, he helps them and delivers them from the plots of evil men.  (37:39-40)
• Lord, help me to realize how brief my time on earth will be.  Help me to know that I am here for but a moment more. (39:4)  This verse goes very well with "Live between the steps" above.  It's also one of my guide lines for life, but I needed to be reminded of this particular one.  I don't behave well in some of my "moments".  I struggle with anger, and I take it out on the one I love the most.  Why is that?  Why can't I realize it and be done with it?  I choose to live in the flesh instead of the Spirit in those moments.  They make all of us sad and hurt.  Lord, I pray you deliver me from anger, in the name of Jesus.  Amen
• As the deer pants for water, so I long for you, O God.  I thirst for God, the living God.  (42:1)
• Yet day by day the Lord also pours out his steadfast love upon me, and through the night I sing his songs and pray to God who gives me life.  (42:8)

Proverbs

• The wise man is glad to be instructed, but a self-sufficient food falls flat on his face.  A good man has firm footing, but a crook will slip and fall. (10:8-9)
• Men with common sense are admired as counselors; those without it are beaten as servants.  A wise man holds his tongue. Only a fool blurts everything he knows, that only leads to sorrow and trouble.  (10:13-14)
• Anyone willing to be corrected is on the pathway to life.  Anyone refusing has lost his chance." (10:17)

It saddens me that I can read God's Word, highlight it, copy it over in my journal, pray over it, and yet still blow it when I allow negative thoughts to enter my head.  I so easily believe the lies of satan, which sets me up for failure.  I don't know why God hasn't given up on me yet, but I know He hasn't.  He's going to hang in there with me until I get it right.  He keeps giving me new opportunities to get it right!  I'm almost 61...when am I going to "grow up"?  I guess I strive toward perfection, but the perfectionist in me, the idealist, trips me up.  I am truly my own worst enemy!!  


The song, "I am crucified with Christ, therefore I no longer live, Jesus Christ now lives in me" is playing right now on my computer background music.  I have preached on that.  I need to be crucified daily, so I am not in charge, but God is.  Saturate me with your Holy Spirit, Father!  I am so needy!

Admonition for Christian Living

Wow...here it is, Sunday night already.  Can't believe this week went by so fast!  I guess that means I've been busy...and I have.  I have put quite a few hours in at the office, covering two jobs and working on special projects.  Love to be busy there!  I'll be alone this coming week (except for hubby) since the reservations secretary is still in Florida until March, and the Events Coordinator/Hospitality Director will be gone all week to ONU for a class.  We already have special projects lined up for this week, so should be another fast one.  I don't mind the winter weeks going by quickly, for that means spring will follow.  Spring is my favorite season of the year...love all the blooming (I don't have allergies!) and watching everything come to life again, including the campgrounds!!


I'm going to be attending a Dave Ramsey Financial Class for 14 weeks, starting the 26th.  I look forward to that.  I am a budgeter, and I use the envelope system, but there must be something still I need to learn since there is always more month than money.  We do live by faith, believe me!!


I attended a travelogue meal and presentation on Texas last week.  It was a social outing for me, since hubby likes to spend his time in other ways.  I went with the church bus gang (all senior citizens).  They go once a month.  Food and fellowship is okay...presentations put me to sleep.  But it is nice to get out of the house now and then.  


We also had a Town Meeting after our residents' potluck this past week.  Hubby needed to talk about some proposed changes in the Township ruling on building codes.  This could benefit the camp lots, so we hope it is an amendment that passes.  Township meeting comes up this week.  


On Wednesday this past week my only sibling, my brother, turned 63...two years older than me.  We chatted for a while.  We don't talk often, we haven't been close through the years, but when we do talk all is well between us.  We just lead different lives in different locales of the country.  


We had falling snow for most of the week, though it didn't accumulate to more than 6-8".  It was a cold week, down in the single digits wind chill.  When we woke up Saturday morning we were having one of the heaviest snows of the week.  However, we had to take a deposit on some chairs to Grand Rapids (an hour north), so we took off on our adventure.  There wasn't a lot of traffic out, and the trip went well.  In fact, we even took time to drive around the historic district of Heritage Hill where the rich and famous lived in the early days of the development of Grand Rapids.  Very large and unique homes.   


The chairs are for our Learning Center.  I have been watching Craig's List for padded, stackable chairs for quite a long time.  This week a church in Grand Rapids was unloading 106 of them...very nice, some still wrapped in their packaging.  Hubby is going tomorrow to pick them up.  The church still needed them for service today.  We feel blessed to get this deal since the chairs are so nice, and match our blue decor at the Learning Center so well.


We did our weekly shopping while we were out on Saturday, and once again I was able to stay within my budgeted envelope amount for food, household, and personal care items.  If I don't stick to the envelope amount, I will run out of money before the end of the month, and that's when we get into trouble.  I am determined this is the year we stick to the plan.


Today we attended morning worship at our local church, and then headed to Lansing to meet up with family for lunch.  It was my father-in-law's birthday, and he chose to eat at Logan's Steakhouse.  There were six of us total...nice lunch.  


After lunch we delivered some tables that the camp is donating to He Cares, We Care ministry at the Meridian Mall in Lansing.  This was our third trip there, and each time it is taking on a new look.  There have been some amazing testimonies coming out of the ministry, and we are glad to be able to donate to the cause.  The Jesus Film is the key focus of the ministry, reaching lives that the typical church will not reach.  People that won't go into a church building feel freer to enter a store front in the mall to see what He Cares, We Care is all about.  With couches, tables, chairs, lamps, big screen TV playing the Jesus Film, magazines, coffee, water, and a relaxing atmosphere...it's a great place to just rest from shopping...or to hang out while other family members shop.  


I've been spending most of my evenings working on my I Peter Bible study blog, studying Greek, and reading my current selection of books (see sidebar).  On cold winter nights, it's a great way to relax and yet keep the mind active.  I also like to play Backgammon on the computer, and browse the web for travel ideas.  I'm currently working on a spring break plan for our granddaughters, if they are able to visit us that week.  I'm also keeping entertained by the half dozen cats that show up on our porch each evening.  Some of them are quite playful, but most of them are just very hungry and very cold.  Having warm water to sip and cheap cat food to nibble renews their energy...maybe keeps them alive.





Well....here's what stood out to me this week in my daily reading of The One Year Bible (Living Bible) and "The Word for You Today":


Three rules for living:

1. Control the climate around you, staying away from negativity, looking for the best in others, being stable and consistent.
2. Laugh at yourself.
3. Factor God in...seek His face, consult His Word, for He can move mountains.

Never tire of loyalty and kindness...trust the Lord completely.  In everything  you do, put God first, and he will direct you and crown your efforts with success.  (Proverbs 3:1-6)

"Reduce the Stress of Serving":

• Stop serving to please others.  "Well done!" must come from God, not others.
• Stop serving in your own strength...remain in God and receive your power from Him.

"If the challenge you're facing doesn't place a demand on your faith, it neither pleases God nor involves Him."

"How God Reveals His Will to Us":

• Through others - attend church regularly and build strong relationships with other Christians
• Through scripture
• Through our heart's desire...what fuels and focuses you?

"Standing when Everything Around You Is Falling":

• live on your knees
• strengthen yourself with God's Word
• refuse to let pride or inadequacy defeat you

Let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall.  (I Cor 10:12)

Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.  (Prov. 16:18)

The man who knows right from wrong and has good judgement and common sense is happier than the man who is immensely rich!  For such wisdom is far more valuable than precious jewels.  Nothing else compares with it.  (Prov 3:12-13)

If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine.  If you cling to your life, you will lose it, but if you give it up for me, you will save it.  (Mt 10:38-39)

Welcome to 2011

Here it is...the First Sunday of the New Year.  Welcome to 2011 and all of its promises.  For just this one year, lets you and me focus on the promises, and turn the problems over to God.  He's better equipped to handle them than we are, and He already knows the outcome anyway.   

I guess you could say one of my strong traits is organization.  I like to keep an orderly house and office.  I like to know where things are and what's coming up on the calendar.  I am a planner, but I can also be spontaneous.  I like surprises (good ones!).  So this past week I have been archiving files at the office and setting up for the new year.  Today I went through the household files, doing the same things.  I am ready to prepare the tax papers (have to wait on the W-2's...which is my responsibility at work.  I'll have them out this next week hopefully.)  It's just a good feeling to start afresh at the beginning of each year.

I also like to start afresh each morning.  I'm a routine person...it helps me keep balance in my life.  My day starts out with my quiet time with God.  I am fortunate to have a small (and I mean very small) office, which I call my study...my Son-Room.  I have a chair at which I can kneel and start my day out talking with my Father.  My desk takes up the rest of the room, but this is where I read my daily devotional material and write in my journal and check in on my daily computer sites (weather, bank, music, Greek, email, and blog). Seems like whenever I come in this room, one or both of my dogs join me.  Tuxedo usually comes in to pray with me, and Kefli comes in and sits on the pillow near my feet.  They are such good companions.  

After my daily quiet time, I walk the dogs (if weather permits).  Then I get ready for the rest of my day.  I like to walk to work if it's not too cold or icy out.  I walk home at lunch.  Often I take the dogs with me to work.  They get bored at the house, and I like having walking companions.  Walking is my form of physical exercise...I don't belong to a gym or Curves because I know I wouldn't be faithful to go.  I like doing what comes naturally, and walking is a very natural way to exercise.

Our office is open Tuesday, Thursday and Friday, but I often go in on Mondays and/or Wednesdays.  Since this is tax month, and I'm the one who does the taxes and sends out the annual forms, this will be a busy month for me.  I need to work on the off days so I am not disturbed by customers.  I will also do my shopping on either Mondays or Wednesdays...my once a week outing.  I look forward to that time...a break from the camp grounds.  During the evenings after supper I tend to use the computer for a while and then kick back and read until bedtime.  

Saturdays are my days to do housework or join hubby in whatever he is doing.  Laundry for me is whenever the basket is full...so it could happen any day of the week, except Sunday.  Saturday is  usually a very flexible day, but we like it to end with pizza and ice cream.  Our once a week treat!!

Sundays we attend corporate worship, have a large lunch, and then just relax the rest of the day...take a nap, read the paper, use the computer for various activities.  This is the day I also like to write my weekly general journal blog and work on my I Peter blog.  I tend to plan for the week ahead:  choose clothes for each day, plan the weekly menu, check my calendar, prepare for what's ahead the next several days.  

So that's a little insight to how I organize my life.  I truly live a laid-back life, even if it sounds structured.  It just helps me keep my balance when I follow routines, allowing for some flexibility.  I live a quiet life, home most of the time, not much activity.  I could probably use a few more outlets.  I keep looking for what interests me.

Had a good weekend.  We spent New Year's Eve with about 20 other people at a neighbor's house.  Lots of finger foods, games, sharing the highlight of 2010.  For me my 2010 highlight was my granddaughter accepting Jesus into her heart.  Somehow it makes my time living and working on this campground worth it all.  New Year's Day we opened our Learning Center building on the campgrounds and invited people to bring in a finger food pot luck lunch.  We had the big screen set up for the Rose Bowl Parade and the football games after lunch.  Some of us played games instead of watching football.  Several attended...lots of food.  It was a nice time.

Okay...time to check back in my journal for the highlights of my devotional reading this week.  What is God saying to me?

See, I have placed before you an open door that no one can shut.  (Rev 3:7)  I love open doors...I am always looking for them, for I love changes (especially moving).  We've been here 7 years now, and that's a long time for me to stay in one place.  But I am asking for contentment to live here as long as God wants us here.  Hubby is totally content here...he has a vision for the future of this campground, and he sees so many things coming about.  2010 was a good year for Indian Lake Nazarene Campground.

I am coming soon.  Hold on to what you have... Those whom I love, I rebuke and discipline.  So be earnest, and repent.  Here I am!  I stand at the door and knock.  If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.  (Rev 3:12...21)  Oh, I would love for Jesus to come soon.  I've been waiting for Him.  I want to see Mom and Dad again.  But meanwhile I want to be the person God wants me to be...I want to be disciplined, and I want to dine with Him in His daily Word to me.

Some notes from "The Word for You Today" (see side bar) on becoming more and more like Christ:

• It is your character, not your personality, that is transformed as you become more like Christ.
• Having life abundantly doesn't mean a lack of adversity, but rather it means growing more like Christ in the midst of adversity.
• God's power is unleashed in obedience.  When we make the right choices, He gives wisdom and faith and power and love to follow through with those choices.
• When we surrender our weaknesses and fears to God, the Holy Spirit works in us to develop us more in the image of Christ.
• Our responsibility in becoming more like Christ:  1) Letting go of our old ways  2) Having our thoughts renewed through prayer and reading/applying God's Word  3) Developing new habits that please God  4) Taking our focus off ourselves and focusing on Christ so that our outlooks change  5) Trusting God in every situation.

Oh, the joys of those who...delight in doing everything God wants them to... For the Lord watches over all the plans and paths of godly men... (Psalm 1:1...6)  I so want God to watch over me, therefore I want to live finding delight in pleasing Him.  

How does a man become wise?  The first step is to trust and reverence the Lord.  (Prov 1:7)  That verse matches up with the final point in becoming more Christ-like.  It's always interesting to me how what I read in a devotional magazine tends to line up with what I am reading that day in God's Word.  It's like God reinforcing to me what He wants me to hear...to learn.  

I finished reading The Daily Bible, which took me through the Bible in one year in chronological order in the New International Version. This year I am reading The One Year Bible, reading through the complete Bible again, but this time I am reading from The Living Bible version...a very easy to read translation.  Each day I will read a portion from the Old Testament, the New Testament, the Psalms, and Proverbs.  That will be a nice variation from last year.  

I do believe that's enough for this Sunday's blog.  Check back next week!

Blustery Sunday

We are in the midst of a major winter storm here in southwest Michigan.  It's the same storm front that ripped the roof on the Minneapolis Metrodome Stadium and dumped all the snow inside.  A lot of football fans unhappy there today, I'll bet.  Thank goodness this happened during the night, before the stadium was loaded with people!!


Rain yesterday pretty much melted all the snow we have had accumulated the past few weeks, and then the temperature dropped and everything became a glaze of ice.  When we woke up this morning, we had perhaps a couple of inches of snow on top of the ice, and it has snowed most of the day thus far.  Very pretty sight outside!  Tree branches are so glittery when encased with ice!  Then sprinkle some snow on top, and it looks like a special homemade treat...best viewed from inside!!


Well, today is the day I MUST make a blog post on my I Peter blog. I've been working on it for 2-3 weeks, and have 15 pages of notes.  I'm trying to get inspired and motivated to start summarizing my notes and writing the blog, or Bible study.  Just wanted to get an update on this blog first.  


Don't know what happened, but all of a sudden yesterday I realized I had close to 500 comments going back to when I first started my blogs, but comments I had never seen before...most of them spam.  So I spent a major portion of last night cleaning up the blogs, and putting some tools in place to prevent that in the future, I hope.


Yesterday Paul and I went to see "A Christmas Carol" in Kalamazoo at CenterPointe Church.  Very nicely done.  That was our "Christmas Date"...a break from routine.


Notes from my devotions this past week:


"Walking By Faith":
Like Abraham when we follow God's leading, we do not know where we are going, but we can be confident that no matter what our path, or how long it takes, God will keep His word to us...He will be with us in our journey through life.  We won't be exempt from problems, but "...he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion."  (Phil. 1:6)  All we need to do is "trust Him with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." (Prov 3:5-6).


"Be Careful What You Say":
"The lips of the godly speak helpful words."  (Prov 10:32)  We need to speak with wisdom, passing on to others what God has taught us.  We can only speak correction if we have earned the right by having a close relationship, speaking the truth in love, and not expecting prompt results or even appreciation.  We need to speak words of encouragement, for hope pierces despair.  Encouragement is a way of bringing healing to the bones.  When we speak, we need to ask ourselves the following questions to avoid hurtful or gossipy words:

• Is it true?  Time will always reveal the truth.
• Is it confidential?  If trust is betrayed, integrity is sacrificed.
• Is it helpful?  Do not partner with satan, who is devoted to defeat.
• Is it necessary?  We are more likely to regret things we do say than things we didn't say.

"Righteousness of God":
"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.  And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And  hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."  (Rom 5:1-50)


"God Will Forgive and Restore You"
God already knows our guilt, so we need to deal with it honestly and confess.  Confession is simply agreeing with God that it is wrong and asking for forgiveness.  He cannot cleanse what we do not confess, and He cannot heal what we won't reveal.


"Instead of Complaining, Change!"

We need to acknowledge our wrong behavior because complaining is an offense to God.  "Let us examine our ways and test them."  (Lam 3:40)  We need to look at our behaviors and determine if they really work.  If not, we need to change them.  Doing things God's way will bring an end to our frustration, and will be the beginning of joy and fulfillment. 


Personal note:  I have been struggling, I've been in a fierce battle with the enemy of my soul.  He is trying to disable me, making me ineffective in God's kingdom work.  He is doing this through my mind and spirit.  It's been a particularly rough week for me, and I've had some pretty low moments, taking me back to the days of my depression.  I won't go there.  All I know to do is pray and keep up with my daily devotional time with Jesus.  I have to make some changes, and this week's devotions spoke directly to me.  


I hope anyone who reads this who is also struggling will recognize that God does know, and He does care about you.  He loves you very much, but He wants you to grow and conquer some more battle ground.  It seems to be something we cannot do without the Holy Spirit, so we must seek our guidance through prayer and reading God's Word, taking to heart what He is saying.  The battle is not ours, it is the Lord's!!

Recap of Dec 1-3 Reading

The books I am currently reading are all listed in the side bar. I typically finish the complete batch of books prior to pulling out a "new" batch. In this particular batch are a couple of brand new books and a Christmas gift book from my son and his wife. The rest are all "reruns". I am continuing to read through my shelved books one more time before unloading them. I have several years' worth of books to reread, so it's nice now and then to have a new book in the batch.

In one particular new book it was noted that no electronic reproduction could be made in any way, shape, or form without written permission of the author/publisher. I respect that. My gut feeling is that if the other books I read were written in this day and technological age, they would contain the same warnings. Therefore, I will no longer quote from any of the books to avoid doing something illegal. Instead I will paraphrase what stands out to me, and perhaps a note about how it applies to me...or what I need to think about. I cannot say it as well as the author, so I am sorry that the actual quotes will no longer be available.

Four of the books in current listing are being read "devotionally". By that I mean I read a chapter per day from each book and comment on it in my journal. They are short, devotional size, chapters, and I feel like I'm getting a tidbit each day from each book. I also treat each book as though it is God himself talking to me about things I need to pay attention to, learn, grow in. So as much as I enjoy my prayer time with the Father, I can hardly wait to get to my four books to see what God has to say to me each day. From there I write my journal notes as I feel inspired. Perhaps I will start sharing that daily, or as time permits, but tonight I will recap my reading/thoughts from the first three days of December.

By the way, not sure I have any followers on this particular blog. I am still continuing my Reflections on Genesis Blog as I have 6-7 more posts to complete the book of Genesis. I will leave that blog up and running once I complete it, but there will not be any new posts after Chapter 50. I had two other blogs...a weekly menu blog and a Journey of Hope blog (my original blog). I shut both of those down. I was conscious that many people may not have sufficient food to eat in a week, and I felt that posting my menu was too much. I obviously eat too much food in a week, and need to cut back and think about those who are struggling with having even the basics of life. My Journey of Hope blog contained many of my earlier writings in life...papers I had written for classes I had taken, sermons I had preached, etc...as well as personal comments about my life. I am sensitive to others and tried not to post anything that would expose others beyond what they have already exposed about themselves. However, there was fear that could happen, since I am such an open book. Out of respect for family members, I shut that blog down. It was during a sad time in my life, and perhaps I jumped the gun too early, but I felt several urgings to do so...so I did. So, for now, this is my only "personal" blog in which I will share my thoughts. However, I will not be mentioning specific people or sharing personal intimate details of my family.

With those disclaimers, I am now ready to recap three days' worth of devotional thoughts:

Monday, December 1, 2008:
1. Depression affects a huge number of our society. I myself experienced clinical depression back in 1987-88. Often depression will cause us to not want to eat, yet not eating tends to only make things worse. We need to eat a balanced meal even when we don't feel like it. Also, how we respond to events in our lives has far more to do with how we feel than what actually happens to us.

2. God has made me unique. The sooner I accept who I am, and quit trying to be who I am not, the quicker I can get on with what God has planned for me to do.

3. When it comes to forgiveness, there are three areas in which forgiveness needs to occur:
-I must forgive others.
-I must forgive myself.
-I must forgive God, as He forgives me. Then I can build a bridge and get over it...no matter what has happened to hinder my advancement in life.

4. If I am going to learn to love, I must recognize that love is first of all patient and kind. I need to control my emotions so they do not control me, and practice extending mercy and gentleness to others by my kind words and thoughtful actions.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008:
1. When we think no one understands us, Jesus always understands. He is so focused on others, rather than on Himself, that even as He was headed to His own crucifixion on the night He was met by the soldiers in the garden, he took time to heal the ear of one of those who had come to arrest him. No pity party for Himself...He still sought to do what was best for others...even His "enemies".

2. A beautiful woman is one who serves others and shares in their lives, allowing God to shine through her. But she does it all without desiring recognition or reward. Her spiritual demeanor is like a fragrance to those around her.

3. Even when we think we are going through horrible persecution, bad things that seem to have no purpose other than to defeat us, God is using that time to draw us closer to Him so that we might better reflect who He is by our attitude and actions. Only through persecution of the early Christians did the church grow. What will God do through those who allow persecution to refine them and make them more in His image?

4. When it comes to love not being selfish, God's Word says it best:
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves. Philippians 2:3

Wednesday, Dec 3, 2008:
1. To avoid being depressed, I need to focus on my accomplishments, not my failures. I need to be patient with myself as much as with others!

2. Each "opportunity" we go through is a time for us to learn and grow and move forward in wisdom. May I be willing to say yes and seek the positive results from the adversities in my life.

3. I must get to the place where Jesus is always my main focus. It is from Him that I receive my purpose and the power I need to fulfill that purpose.

4. Love is thoughtful. Rather than rushing ahead with the words that come to mind, think about how they will be received, and choose to say things kindly and with respect.

5. God honors faith, even faith the size of a mustard seed. He can do mighty things for those who have faith and believe.

Ephesians 6:10-17

Finally, build your strength in union with the Lord and by means of his mighty power. Put on all the armor that God gives you, so that you will be able to stand up against the Devil's evil tricks. For we are not fighting against human beings but against the wicked spiritual forces in the heavenly world, the rulers, authorities, and cosmic powers of this dark age. So put on God's armor now! Then when the evil day comes, you will be able to resist the enemy's attacks; and after fighting to the end, you will still hold your ground.

So stand ready, with truth as a belt tight around your waist, with righteousness as your breastplate, and as your shoes the readiness to announce the Good News of peace. At all times carry faith as a shield; for with it you will be able to put out all the burning arrows shot by the Evil One. And accept salvation as a helmet, and the word of God as the sword which the Spirit gives you. Do all this in prayer, asking for God's help. Pray on every occasion, as the Spirit leads.

I never read this passage of scripture without recalling the time our youngest son preached from this passage at East Brainerd Church of the Nazarene in Chattanooga, TN, back in the early 1990's. I believe if he had opportunity to cross over from this life into the next and could truly experience the evil forces at work, he could preach this once again with such conviction and passion that those who heard him could not doubt there are two forces at work in our world.

It appears that satan's forces are winning...they certainly are deceiving many, including those who have been Christians. We know that in the end Christ will reign supreme, and only those who have claimed Him as their Savior will truly taste the victory. I wish those caught in the bondage of living for selfish pleasures could truly see they have sold their souls to the devil and there is never a better day ahead for them. Today is the best day they will have. The chains of bondage are drawn tighter and tighter until there is no escape.

I pray the Jesus Christ will break those chains that bind the ones I love and set them free to be the giant of a person that they were created to be! Battles in the kingdom of God will be lost if they do not step into their leadership roles and press on toward the goal of ultimate victory over evil and eternal damnation.

I pray for more warriors for God's side to come forth and take their stand. It's a serious world, with a very serious outcome. I can no longer stay silent. Time is short. Only what is done for God will make an eternal difference. For my children and my grandchildren I pray for victory over the forces of evil...that God's angels will protect them from the Evil One. May those who come behind me find me faithful!